Why Bodywork? When Talking Is Not Enough
By Diana Lightmoon, 2003
Freud didn't have to be a genius to discover his famous "talking cure."
Women have known about the therapeutic value of talking it out for
hundreds, if not thousands, of years. In times of trouble, it is not
uncommon for both men and women to turn to their closest friends for
help. Mostly what we seek is a sympathetic ear, someone to listen to
our woes with compassion. But what actually happens in the process of
talking, is we discover things we hadn't seen before. We come up with
answers to our problems that we might not have discovered otherwise.
Sometimes, however, talking is not enough. When you find yourself
repeating the same story over and over again, or hearing your friend's
unchanging story for the tenth time, you've hit that impasse. This is
when you cautiously suggest that your friend might need counseling, or
you enlist the aid of a therapist yourself. We're fortunate to live in
times when this is no longer stigmatized and in a part of the world
where there's an abundant supply of trained ears who bring a practiced
wisdom to their listening. Often, this is all that's needed to get over
that hump, to make the necessary changes so we don't go around sounding
like echoes of ourselves.
And sometimes it is not. Sometimes we need to stop talking and start
listening. Not to other people, but to ourselves. Obviously, any good
therapist facilitates this process. The deepest listening happens,
however, when we bring attention not only to our minds, which can talk
endlessly, but to the quieter language of the body. When we expand our
awareness to include what's happening in the body, we tap into a wisdom
that goes beyond ordinary thought and discourse. Like poetry, the body
uses metaphor to express itself against a backdrop of silence that
offers the possibility of peace as well as profound insight.
One of the reasons that the fast pace of modern Western life is so
stressful is that it cultivates a split between mind and body. We drive
our bodies until they scream at us to stop and even then we often find
it difficult to heed their message. The body moves at a much slower
pace than the mind does. In our minds we can be days, weeks, even years
ahead of ourselves, lost in fantasies and plans about the future, or
equally preoccupied in the past. The body is much more rooted in the
present moment. By paying attention to our somatic experience, we keep
ourselves grounded in the here and now. A radical shift in
consciousness takes place when we finally take the time to listen to
what our bodies have to say.
For people who have been traumatized, the body is even more important.
Bessel Van der Kolk, a renowned clinician and researcher in the trauma
field, emphasizes the importance of working "from the bottom up." By
this, he means bringing clients into direct contact with their
corporeal experience and not just talking about what happened.
According to his studies, traumatic memory is encoded more as sensory
information than as narrative like normal memory. All the talking in
the world cannot clear out those sensory imprints. That's why simple
things like sounds, smells, and touch can trigger flashbacks in
traumatized people. Body-focused work becomes absolutely necessary at a
certain point in recovery, but it must be done sensitively, with a
great deal of caution, presence, and compassion, in order for it not to
be re-traumatizing.
Most of our early memory from the first six years of life is
non-verbal as well. Since this is when we're most impressionable and
our basic patterns get set, being able to access it through bodywork
can be tremendously helpful. As infants, we get our sense of security
and safety from the way we are touched and handled. When we become
toddlers, it is through the movement of our bodies that we begin to
assert ourselves and separate from our mothers, developing a sense of
our own individuality. Spiritual work often entails going back through
these stages to clear out any distortions that may have developed so
that we can feel safe enough to experience a boundless state of unity
again. Jack Kornfield, a Vipassana meditation teacher, has remarked in
his book, A Path with Heart, how so many people coming to spiritual
practice carry wounds from childhood that must be addressed before
deeper states of meditation can be realized.
Bodywork offers not only the possibility of healing the past but of
experiencing some of these spiritual states. Deep relaxation requires a
surrender of the defensive holding or muscular tension in the body that
is the physical analog of the ego. It asks us to let go of who we think
we are and just be. All roles, ideas, and images of ourselves fall away
as we give in to the delicious sensation of simply resting in the
moment. There is just the movement of the breath through empty space
and our hearts opening to the vast peace, love, and joy that is
possible in that wordless state.
We've come a long way since Freud, and our understanding of the
connection between mind, body, and spirit has given rise to many
different modalities, everything from biofeedback and EMDR to Rosen
Method Bodywork which I practice. Even the medical field has begun to
recognize the importance of the connection in addressing disease and
illness. But one does not need to be at death's door or suffering
extreme physical or emotional pain to take advantage of the many
body-focused disciplines available. Prevention has always been the best
cure. But more than that, we open ourselves to expanded consciousness
and powerful transformation when we venture beyond the place where
words can carry us.